SOCIAL MEDIA

Monday, 11 June 2018

The Fear Of Eating Out

I think when you're in the comfort of your own home and you're highly aware of what's in the fridge, and when you'll be eating them; dinnertime isn't something that's considered scary. However, take me to any restaurant, pub or cafe, and I am SCREWED! Looking through the menu and just knowing that everything is bad for me, and the fear of just not knowing the calories, or what it's going to do to my body.


Eating out with friends and family are both two different things for me. I think eating out with friends, is kind of when I can make both good and bad decisions with food. I'm either heavily influenced by their choices, or I just go for something that sounds extremely healthy, that actually doesn't taste so good.



(Not my picture, this belongs to my gal Lauren.)

This is one of the meals I've had recently with friends, Deanna and Lauren. This was an offer for 3 Tapas options with a free large glass of wine for £13.95. And honestly? It was probably one of the healthiest options I've ever had. Here's what I had:
  • Goat's Cheese & Spinach Croquettes
  • Garlic Mushrooms on Sourdough Toast (v)
  • Bacon Popcorn
Not gonna lie, I do realise that bacon popcorn isn't the most healthiest option out of the three, however there wasn't anything else there that didn't have a spice. I'm not the biggest spice fan, and especially hate anything with a chilli dip. Altogether though, I honestly loved the food, it was delicious, and I'd definitely try that again!



So that was on Tuesday. It was perf, and then on Thursday, I met up with another friend of mine: Danielle. We went to Nandos which is one of those restaurants that make me nervous. I had a Butterfly Chicken, which was the healthy part. And then chips and garlic bread as sides. I eat rather healthy, so carbs can be okay as well.


If anyone has any tips and tricks for eating out with friends and family, please let me know in the comments below.

Thursday, 7 June 2018

Dear Diary; Please forgive me, for I have sinned.

I think that because in the past, writing in my diary was classed as a form of therapy for me; I think is why I've been putting it off. Because of my mental health, and how overthinking makes my emotions turmoil, I think is why I've been avoiding it. However, whenever I get the need - the want, to write in my diary, there’s almost a voice inside my head that tells me not to. Almost dares me, at the same time. And I don’t know why it is. My diary is a safe place. It’s my little book of thoughts and emotions written down, for just me to read. What am I scared of?

I think overall, it’s the old worry from my old job, that maybe someone will read it. A family member, a friend if they see it. Curiosity is everywhere, and you never know. I once caught my dad reading some lyrics I’d written in there. As soon as I did, I called him out on it. He apologised instantly, as he wasn’t aware it was my diary. He thought it was just a notebook with lyrics on. And my dad is one of my biggest supporters when it comes to anything creative. Whether that be editing or writing. He just wants me to follow my dreams. 

Especially last year, when my mental health was constantly up and down, there was this assumption in my head; that if I didn't write it down in my diary, it didn't happen. And I think that's mentally still my thought process. But I should be writing everything down. Because when I'm older, I know I'll want to read back of everything that happened.

I'm slowly on a journey to both love myself, and love my diary again. (Two different journeys - one important and one not so important???) Well, that's what other people think. My diary is something that has always been one of those things that I love having with me. Almost like a comfort blanket.

It sounds silly, but life just sometimes gets in the way. And I feel like, if I want to get something done sometimes, I need to set myself reminders. And it does sound silly. It should be the last thing that I do. Like vlogging, I want to look back at my entries and feel like I'm there all over again.

My love for writing in a diary originated from a British TV Show called My Mad Fat Diary. (If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it!) That show is how I met both Phoebe and Joanne. I was so good 2014-2016 writing in a diary. So I need to get back on it! It's June now, and I feel like I've barely written in it. 

Do any of you guys write a diary, Bridget Jones or Rae Earl style? What kind of diaries do you write in? Is it a daily diary like Bridget? Or is it just a random notebook like myself and Rae? Let me know in the comments below.

Monday, 4 June 2018

Another Hint Of Clarity

It was a moment of clarity, when she realised it was better being the one he could always turn to; rather than being the one on her arm.

It's when she sat beside him, and their arms brushed that she realised, maybe this wasn't what she wanted after all. But instead, it was the laughs they shared, and the jokes they made.

She wondered if she really ever sat down and thought about it, if it was the comforting thought she wanted, or if it was really him. But as she sat there, in that moment, with him sitting beside her; she realised. She would rather have him in her life forever, rather than just for a little while.

And that for her, was clarity.

Saturday, 2 June 2018

Are you Beach Body Ready? No? Me Neither...

Continuing on my body positivity on my blog, I wanted to do a small blog post in regards to the whole "beach body ready" saga. I find it really annoying when it's coming to Summer, that there's so many adverts and signs that say, "are you beach body ready?" And then there's some diet pills, shake replacement meals or something else. My question is: what the hell is beach body ready? What body shape makes you look ready for the beach?

When searching it, this is what comes up:
Image result for beach body ready

When I personally think of myself and my body being "beach body ready", I always think of this picture:

This is where I felt the most positive about my body. And I can tell you now, my body doesn't look like that. My thighs have gotten bigger, so has my backside, and my love handles are more obvious. But myself and Phoebe have been talking. We're going on holiday in August, and with my body positivity, but also insecurities, I've been wondering about the whole, bikini thing. 

We're going away with my mum, her boyfriend, Thomas (brother), Catherine (sister in law) and the kiddos are all going together, and we're all so, so excited. With so many people going, my anxiety is going sky high, and all I want to do is be at the gym and eating salads. But like Phoebe said, we're all comfortable with each other, so why should I care?

I am still going to go to the gym the same amount of times that I usually go. I will still keep eating healthy, and panic when going out for food. I just need to keep my head focused on my healthy lifestyle that I want. Because after all: a healthy mind is a healthy life. Or is it the other way around?


The point of this post is that if you're getting down over the adverts and posts about being "beach body ready", then don't worry. Your body is beautiful and stop freaking out about not having the right body for the summer. There's no such thing as having the right body, and you need to learn to accept yourself the way you are.

Tuesday, 29 May 2018

Introducing My Work Space!

I always find that working at a desk, with my notebooks beside me and earphones is where I'm the most motivated. Before I put together a "work space", I would either sit on my bed or sit in the living room working on either a video, writing my book or blog post. And I found they were both places where I would become easily distracted. I found that my work flow just lost its momentum in less that 30 minutes of starting, which then created a backlog of things I wanted to be done, but were extremely delayed.


So after a few months of begging and planning in my head, I decided to bring over the small desk I bought for my mum's that never got used there, and create a small working environment for myself to remained focus. I chose my old bedroom for two reasons. 1: the room is only used when my brother visits with the rest of the family and 2: the internet is poor. Which might make you wonder how that's a good thing. One of my many distractions is my phone, like the rest of my generation. So the further in my room I am, the worse the internet connection is. So it's a win-win. 



So my office essentials are:

  • Laptop
  • Earphones
  • Book/Magazine holder (holding all my notepads that are essential)
  • Storage boxes (holding my organiser and smaller notepads - the smaller one is to hide the phone LOL & glue and tippex)
  • Storage bin (other small stationery stuff)
  • Pen pot
  • Stationery equipment (paperclips, pins, etc)
  • Memo pad
  • Hardrive
If you don't know this by now (seriously how could you not?!), I'm currently writing a book. So S P O I L E R  A L E R T name of the book has been revealed LOLS! But anyway, I sometimes find myself stuck a little and need a little bit of inspiration. So above my desk, I have a vision board of the book, with little edits I've put together and outfit inspirations. When I'm about to give up for the night, I find myself looking up at the board and hoping for inspiration. I also have fairylights around it so I can turn them on and off, as if I'm "on and off the clock". When the lights are off, I'm done. If they're on, I'm working and I'm not available.

The "peace, love & vodka" is a card I saw in Paperchase in the Sale section and I just instantly fell in love with it. I decided it would be a nice addition to my office space.




These books are basically my saving grace! I wanted to do a little section on  these, as I wouldn't be able to function without them!!! So let's talk about them from top to bottom!

  1. My organiser; aka the one thing that keeps me on top. This little diary was bought for Christmas by my mum and I LOVE IT! I'm not gonna lie, I'm getting worse as the months go on to keep on track, but I AM TRYING!!!! I just need to learn to stick to it! This little book has every appointment in it, everything I need to do to get shit done on time (lol this post is 3 days late. Blame Bank Holiday!) I know what needs done and I get to check them off when I'm done. Which, lamely, I really love doing.
  2. My "GIRL BOSS" notebook. In this I basically write down all my blog posts idea and put down all the things I want to write on the post and the idea around it, etc. Joanne bought me this for my birthday, and I'm not gonna lie, I love it for the whole Girl Boss title. Because this is my little "empire" I'm attempting to create. When I've written in my organiser that I'm posting a certain post a few weeks ahead before, going to this notebook helps me remind me the details I wanted to write.
  3. My blog scheduler - not even kidding! So Anna Saconne-Joly mentioned on her Instagram story a method that really helps her keep on track with her videos and blog posts. Basically it's a lot of checking off and obvs it's something I love. I might do another post about it, so if you want that, let me know! This is technically an extra step that isn't actually needed, but I've found it SO HELPFUL! So, thanks Anna!
  4. My "Book Ideas" notebook: My holy grail, my love of my life; my sanity. All my ideas for the book I'm writing goes into here. Anything I want to plan to write in future chapters, description of characters, mood boards. Everything goes in here. And it will continue on with any other book I write afterwards (lol I love this book too much and the thought of writing another story makes me emosh!) This is constantly open when I'm writing, checking over details and making sure everything matches.


And last but not least: candles. A not-so-necessary-but-appreciated addition to my office space. I love a cosy atmosphere when I'm working on something quite late. Late as in, it's getting dark and I'm not working the next day. These three were given to me by Phoebe and I thought they were cute. They say: Relax, Breathe, #LetGo. I thought they were appropriate in an office environment. They also have a generic vanilla smell as well, which I always find relaxing.



And that's my lil work space. Trying to get back on top of things at the moment. With writing a book and wanting to upload at least two decent quality blog posts a week, it's getting hard. See ya soon, folks!

Wednesday, 23 May 2018

Is Online Dating Ruining Romance?


This is a thought process that I've been toying with for a little while now. As you may or may not know, I am single, and obvs looking for love. (🤢🤮) And of course, when it comes to dating/meeting someone in this generation, it's all about online dating. Aka. My worst enemy. I currently have a love/hate with online dating. Mainly because I'm fighting against being a hopeless romantic and also being lazy.


Cons

I find the modern day dating apps quite shallow. For example; Tinder and Bumble both require for you to look at a bunch of images and decide instantly if you're physically attracted to them in just a handful of photos. Then if you're attracted, you swipe left. If you're not, swipe right. If yourself and the other person both swipe yes, you match. And boom. There begins the conversation. I believe that when it comes to dating, yes you need to be attracted to the person in some sort of sense, however it's also a lot more than just that.

 I talked all about my experience with Tinder on my YouTube. Click below to watch that for my full, honest review.


Call me old fashioned, but I always imagined the story of how I met the Love Of My Life not including an online presence. Not straight away, anyway. I want it to be some epic love story, but I also realise how unrealistic that probably is. But like they say in the films: I'm entitled to have high standards. And why should I settle for less? I want a romance to start like they do in films and in books. Not by saying, "he found me fit, so he swiped left."



Pros

It's only fair that if I sit here completely bashing online dating, that I need some arguments from the opposite point of view.

It's an easy tool to use to either meet new people or start "talking" to someone at the comfort of where you are. You don't need to be outside in public in a bar, or a coffee shop. You can be at home, watching TV, listening to music, etc. Online dating can be transported anywhere. It's a limited tool.

Another pro of online dating is that if you're someone like me and you have social anxiety, it's a good way of becoming comfortable before actually having to be face to face with someone. Being put into situations where I have to sit there, start conversations and keep it flowing actually frightens me sometimes. So spending time online and chatting with them in a comfortable environment, learning their little quirks and personality; will then make it easier when meeting it in person.

There's no pressure. You don't need to reply instantly. You can come back to the conversation once you've thought of a logical response, or something interesting. You're not stood opposite them, them looking over at you and waiting for you to finally respond. Which kind of links me back to the social anxiety thing.



Overall, I would prefer an epic love story like you see in the films or read in the books. But with this day and age and how pro-technology this generation is, I don't really think we have a choice on it anymore.

Let me know what your thoughts are online dating. Are you pro dating apps or against them? Let's discuss it in the comments!

Friday, 18 May 2018

Finding My Fitness Feet!

Following my previous post (click here to read it), I thought I would follow up with a brand new instalment. These pictures are hard for me to post, because I'm still battling with feeling self-love and all, but eff it. I'm turning a new leaf.

I like to go to the gym 4/5 times a week. That's usually a mixture of attending gym classes or doing my own workouts. I like the variety, because yes I love my gym and I love the instructors that do the classes, but I don't want to be too dependant on them. I have my own journey that I'm working on fitness wise, and when I get there, I don't want to become lazy and then losing motivation. The type of classes I do are:

  • Monday - HIIT
  • Tuesday - Kettlebells
  • Wednesday - HIIT and Body Conditioning 
  • Thursday - (depending on if I'm working or not) Body Conditioning/Rest Day
  • Friday - Rest Day
  • Saturday - (depending on if I'm working or not) My own workout/Rest Day
  • Sunday HIIT
As you can see it's a variety for me. I've purposely started going to the body conditioning classes again, so then it's not all just cardio. I definitely am liking doing some weight work in both classes and on my own. My gym has a weight room and it's so much fun. (If you follow me on Instagram, you'll be able to see some snaps from there when I'm doing my own thing).


I kind of wanted to break down my entire thought process of my gym experience into a bunch of pros and cons. So if you're a nerd like me and enjoy that, then you're in for a right ole treat...

Classes are great, but there's definitely pros and cons to them.

Cons

  • Dependant on a teacher to give you the workout
  • Can't work on the areas you need, as it's a group workout and everyone needs different areas they're working on
  • Can be very repetitive each week

Pros:

  • They're more experienced and know what's good for the class as a whole
  • Motivates you to keep going on when you're giving up
  • A social place 
Those are just a few that I thought I'd mention and add a few on each heading, rather than it being unfair on one point to the other.


If you read my blog, you'll know I do sometimes post my workouts that I've put together. I'm quite aware that I'm no expert and that these are only for what I need to focus on. However, if anyone wants to try them out, that's completely fine. Since I'm constantly changing things up, I'll most probably upload more throughout the year.



I'm still working things out. Figuring what exercises work best for my body. It's a learning process and I want to bring you all along on my journey. Every few months, I'm going to make blog posts all about my progress, what I've changed, etc.

Thanks for reading my long overdue post, and I'll be back with two blog posts next week.

Thursday, 3 May 2018

Learning Self-Love.

As a person that's lived a life filled with insecurity and doubt, I've realised my priorities have been influenced in the wrong direction. I'm at the age where are getting married, starting families or living the single dream. Me? I'm just kind of stuck at a crossroad, a bit unsure which I road I belong in. And then last week, it hit me. I don't belong on either path. Not right now, anyway. That's the problem with being in your twenties; there's so much pressure. 

Everyone around me are either dating or in a relationship, and it's the moment you sit there in your room and ask yourself: when is it my turn? And then at work, it hit me. How can I expect to be in a loving relationship when all I've done all my life is struggle to love myself? And I think it's time to start that process. To sit down and really look at myself. Instead of cringing when I look in the mirror, point out what I like about myself. Because then, who knows? A miracle can happen and I'll actually like myself more. 

This isn't one of those blog posts where I write a full post about my insecurities and then ask for tons of comments of compliments to boost my self-esteem. Definitely not that. That's another thing you should know about me: compliments. I don't really take them well. This is a blog post that's the start of the future. Learning to love myself and learning to accept my flaws and to not care what other people think. 


I'm not going to lie and say that being 4 foot 7.5 is easy. You get looks, you get comments that people think are funny, but really they're offensive to you and they hurt. It fucking sucks, to sum it up. But at the end of the day, this is me and this is who I am. This is exactly how I'm meant to be and basically, I've got to get fucking over it. It's not going to change. I can't become taller overnight, like I used to wish. This is how I was made and you know what? If 9 year olds want to take the piss that they're practically taller than me, then go for it babes. Because I don't give a damn anymore. I'm short! Get over it, hun. I'm strong enough to deal with this.

And as I wrote that, it was like it hit me. Clarity struck me and I was rooting for the character to understand that she's exactly how she's meant to be, but then I realised. It's not a character... it's me. And I need to get it. 

The more I think about it, the more stupid I feel. My family love me exactly how I am. My brother and I are the complete opposites: he's around 6 foot and I'm not even 5 foot. And we still get along and no one really ever... questions it. (I mean I did genuinely believe that I was adopted for a few years, 8 years ago...) But then I realise, my mum and dad aren't exactly the tallest people in the world. My mum's 5 foot 2, and my dad's 5 foot 5.5. So really, the abnormal one in this situation, is actually my older brother. Right?


Another thing that is a thought in my head that constantly niggles me. Something that gets me so agitated, I literally have to force myself to get out of that dark place: my weight. Being short, you're naturally short and stumpy. It's just a thing that happens and unfortunately, I got a Kim K arse that I never wanted nor asked for. And most of my friends have said that they wished they had it. And like I always say; if you wanna switch, that's fine with me.

As a typical female around my age, the things I hate about my body are the following: my stomach, thighs, arms and bum. And I'm trying my best to focus on this. I don't expect this to all disappear overnight. I'm working on exercises to help me fix these issues in a healthy and natural way. And a hella lot of weights. (Jokes, more like HIIT workouts). But I've discovered a quote that I thought once, and I stick by it:
I am a work in process.
And when I go to the gym, with a low mood and no motivation; I remind myself of this. 


However, moving on from fitness (I’m planning on doing a full blog post separately on this. Yes this is turning into a self-love series). Moving back onto the original point of the post: me. How am I expecting someone else to love me; for all my flaws and all my faults, if I can’t even sit there and love myself? Accept my flaws and realise that’s just who I am? I can’t. Which is why I make sure I don’t get close enough to someone, so I don’t get hurt, and ultimately, neither do they.

It’s a working progress, in the gym and outside the gym. But maybe I should start the process of listing one thing that I like about myself daily. Maybe it’ll turn into something where I’ve run out… because I love everything about myself.




And that’s my little post on clarity. It turned into something longer than expected, however I think I needed it. Whilst writing this post, I’ve had a few realisations – a breakthrough if you will. And I’m already feeling like I’m getting closer to the end.

Wednesday, 25 April 2018

Writing Wednesday

You may or may not know, I'm currently writing a book. Since the end of September 2016, this book has been my baby. I've mentioned it a few times on my YouTube that I'm writing it, but recently I've been getting really into it again (thanks writer's block), and I wanted to share a little of my world with you. I will admit, it's not the first book I've ever written. I wrote a book back in High School/College and it was all about Fallen Angels. That was my first baby, however, even though I love that book and I'd love for it to be out there on shelves and have a shot; I kind of feel like I sort of... copied my favourite book at the time. And that book is Hush Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick.

Now don't get me wrong, the way I set my characters, the storyline, etc. was all my idea. Although, I do feel like my book was heavily influenced by the Hush Hush series. It had the main character, whom was shy and a damsel in distress, the typical bad boy and a sidekick. It was based in a High School where they meet in a lesson because they become partners. (Sound familiar? If you've read the trilogy, you'll get that).

Even though I absolutely adore my book, Control Over Me, I didn't want to publish it. The guilt knowing that I had written this book, while reading or re-reading this trilogy, was always there. Whenever I have a quick look back, I can see a lot of similarities. And that's the struggle with having a look of writing and reading: you can't do both at the same time.


To kind of, avoid this happening again, I make sure that I read different genres. So now that my book that I'm currently writing is based on a girl that works in a cafe, who meets a CEO of a company, I can now read the Hush Hush trilogy. For the simple fact that there's no angels, no immortality, no similar locations and no bad boy. Just an introvert who wants to write and another introvert that can't understand how he feels. But I don't want to spoil that completely and give away all my ideas.

This time around, writing this book has been a slow process. It's contained a lot of writer's blocks, frustrations and a lot of perfectionism. I want this book to be the first book I ever publish, and have people picking it up off the shelves and buying it. I don't want to this be another Control Over Me disaster where it just gets left on a memory stick, to then be forgotten. This is a book that I've actually taken the time to really sit down and think about the structure. To think about how I want the chapters to go, what I want to write. I'm taking the time to really dissect the characters and really think about what they'd do in these situations. And I'm definitely not trying to create a damsel in distress. Because my main character is most certainly not one. She's stronger than she realises. She just needs a little push here and there.


To say I’ve gotten into this book would be an understatement. I mean, I even created a vision board for my book, as you can see above. This is a little snippet into my world, and the characters. I want to create more boards, explaining their personalities, their hobbies, their pet peeves. I feel like I’m so emotionally invested in this book, it might have to turn into a trilogy. I think that’s another reason why it’s been such a slow progress. Because I don’t ever want to say goodbye to these characters and this world. 

Aside from creating vision boards, I’ve also been creating other things. Things that are needed for the book. I want to create social media accounts, websites, everything. I want this book to shine and when it’s finally out, have a place where readers can visit, to make them feel almost as if they’re part of the progress of the story. 



I feel like I’ve spoke. Too much and rambled in forever. If you made it to the end; congrats! It’s over! If you have, maybe leave a comment with the phrase... “Control Over Me”, and then I know who the are  that read until the end. Until next time....

Monday, 23 April 2018

I MISS IRELAND!

Hello Humans! So... I miss Ireland. Already. And it's been A DAY! I've got a big-ass vlog uploaded on YouTube that I put up today, and that's linked below. But I just wanted to write about my experience, because this is the first time I actually travelled by myself to another country. (It's technically another country, just linked - right????)


The airport was pretty easy. I know the Leeds Bradford airport like the back of my hand. But I didn't realise how boring it is being there for 2 hours... I had breakfast at Camden Food and then I chilled there for a bit. After that, I thought I'd have a look at the shops (again, forgot how small). So I looked in Duty Free and then realised I wanted a specific perfume that I knew they wouldn't sell, and I'm not the biggest fan of the ones they sell. I mean, I could've looked at the alcohol and sweets, but I'm not really into that stuff, or carrying it around. I find Duty Free's awkward, because the staff are always around asking if you need help, etc. And I'm too socially awkward for that shit.

Waiting around was just extensive, and I was exhausted because of getting up at 4:30. It was a lot of standing around, staring at the departures board and just praying that it time hurried up. The boarding was a breeze. Well, apart from my bloody Flybe app messing around when it was my turn, and I awkwardly had to be like, "sorry, my app." But the woman was really respectful and fine with it. I got a window seat, which is what I like, because I love looking outside and seeing us start and end the flight.


*   *   *   *   *

Seeing my brother was such a good feeling. We always say we dislike each other, but when we're together, we're kind of inseparable at the minute. Especially when we're by ourselves. I forgot what colour car he had, lol. I couldn't remember if it was silver or black. Turns out it's silver. I forget, because when he lived here in England, and first moved over, he had a red Ford Fiesta, so I always have that in my head.

Seeing Oisin was amazing. My little nephew/godson. He's such a little ball of happiness, and he's always a happy soul. He's easy going and isn't really bothered by much. AND HE'S STARTING TO SPEAK! Mollie, oh my goodness!!! We picked her up from preschool and Thomas peered in to see her, and then he let her see me. Wow, she  got out of her seat, and ran over to me and jumped up into my arms. I've never experienced this before from Mollie, so it completely melted my heart. All her teachers were like, "ah so you're Brogan then."

*   *   *   *   *

I'm not going to do a run through of everything we did, just because I'm inserting my vlog at the end, but I did want to say that overall the experience was absolutely amazing. I was proud that I managed to fly by myself for the first time. I was really excited and only a tiny bit nervous. I sat next to a girl on the way home, who was petrified of flying. I found it interesting to see it from a different point of view. (Is that weird? Is that slightly twisted???)


Friday, 20 April 2018

Travelling Planning.

Hello Humans! Hope your week has been good! As you read this, I'm currently in Ireland, having the most amazing time with family. (Already sad to go home and I've just got here!)

In today's post, I'm going to talk about how I plan for travelling to Ireland. It's just a weekend trip, I'm only going to Ireland on a plane for less than an hour, but I STILL need to plan!!




Make a list!



I find making lists of everything I want to take so useful. It doesn't help that I'm overly organised, and lists excites me. (Yes, I am a nerd.) I find this useful, so then if I have anything else that I want to add to the list, I can during the week.




Keep it light.


Remember that yes, you're technically going on a small vacation, you're still only travelling a domestic flight. Which means a; you can only have 10kg of luggage, including a handbag, and b; you actually have to keep the luggage with you.

I use a small hand luggage every time I go (as you can see, lol), and this one is actually my mum's, because mine ripped inside - sad times. I like this one however, as it's a good size and a lightweight suitcase. And because I'm short af, I need a suitcase that I can have under the seat in front of me, because I can't reach the overhead locker thingy.




Check the weather.

I mean, no offence to Ireland, but it has the most shitty weather ever! It always rains and when it's sunny, you can guarantee it's the last day of the trip and you're only there for the morning and then you're back to England. BUT there's a possibility that we're having a bbq this weekend, so you know I'm excited for that!!!!




H A V E  F U N !

As cheesy as it sounds, just enjoy it. Don't stress, argue, etc. Make memories, capture the moments and keep them forever. 



And those are my few tips and tricks. Most of my travelling consists on me stressing over my dad being too laid back and then running through the airport to get the flight... ðŸ™„ This is my first EVER time flying by myself. Not with a parent, not with Phoebe. LITERALLY by myself! If you want to see how I get along, look out for my Ireland post on Monday. (A big-ass vlog is going up Monday and a music-style video is going up on Tuesday!)



Wednesday, 18 April 2018

Darkness & Loneliness

It starts off gradually,
Almost as if you barely feel it.
And then it creeps up your throat,
And it's like you can't breathe.

It spreads all over your body,
Until you feel it everywhere;
Nothing.

You feel everything shut down,
And there's screaming in your head:
Everything you've not said,
Everything you've thought.

You sit there, waiting.
For it to stop feeling numb,
For it to stop hurting at the same time.

It's everything all in one,
And it's the hope that it stops.
Tick, tock. Tick, tock...

Monday, 16 April 2018

MUSIC MONDAY; NOUGHTIES EDITION! 🎶

Hello Humans! Hope you're all well! I'm currently counting down the days until the weekend (which means it'll probs go slow ðŸ™„). A N Y W A Y, you'll see the full vlog and a music-style video next Monday and Tuesday!

SO THIS BLOG POST! I've decided to throw it back to my childhood and share with you some of the songs/artists that I love/d!



Westlife - Uptown Girl

OH EM GEE! I absolutely LOVE Westlife. Always have - always will! But this song!!!! ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ The video, the song, the freaking vibe! Everything about this song is just amazing! It was for red nose day and all money went to charity. I dunno, I miss these boys. And I'm sad that they broke up.



Girls Aloud - Jump

Okay I only chose this one because I wanted to use this gif. I'm not gonna lie, I wasn't the biggest fan of Girls Aloud, but I do love this song. And I love Hugh Grant in this scene. Girls Aloud was so popular in the 2000s.



S Club 7 - Reach

Oh my god okay. So I used to LOVE S Club 7 back in the day! I used to have the magazines, this box thing to put them in. I was a MASSIVE fan of S Club 7! I feel like you were a fan of Steps or S Club 7, and I dunno. Steps never really interested me that much, however I did like some of their songs.



Sugababes - Round Round

God I love a little bit of Sugababes. I know they changed members constantly, but this era was MY ERA! And I fricking loved it!! This album was perf, and I love so many of their songs, and whenever I hear their songs, I get so excited.



Robbie Williams - Rock DJ

My love for Robbie Williams is all thanks to my brother. He was, and still is, obsessed with him. This music video is so weird, but that's how he is and how he loves to be. But this is deffo the song I first heard from him, that I loved! But yeah, be prepared if you watch the video. Just, be prepared.



And those are the songs/artists I used to love in the 2000's/noughties! Let me know in the comments which songs you used to love, and if you've only just discovered some of these artists now, you are welcome!

Friday, 13 April 2018

FLASHBACK FRIDAY; NEW YORK CITY!


ELLO LOVES! It’s Friday! Have ya got that Friday Feeling?! Anyone working tomorrow? Yep, me too. Oh wellllllll.

So thanks to Zoë/Zoella I now have a HUGE hole in my heart, because I MISS NEW YORK CITY! So I thought I'd do a quick Flashback Friday on here and relive some of the mems.

 Look at my genuine happiness! This is when we were in the Observatory, and I genuinely could not believe how HUGE New York was as a whole. We had fancy iPads (as you can see here in the pic), and certain buildings came up with a video filled with facts. It was really interesting!
And that is only PART of it! 

So Feebs came up with this idea of us getting a picture pretending to move the rock. Getting up there was the most difficult part and I was so petrified.

 Also enjoy a few vlogs I put together from my trip;