Monday, 30 October 2017

Music Monday.



Hello Humans! Today I thought it was time to bring back:

Music Monday!

Music is a big part of my life, so why not share with you songs I have been loving from the past week. I will be posting these weekly, and I'll try my best to do at least 5 songs a week, but at the moment, Niall's new album is the only thing I'm listening to, so...



1. Niall Horan ft. Maren Morris - Seeing Blind.




Oh. My. Effing. GOD! I think I love thing song just a little too much. It's so cute and sweet, and it just makes me think of falling in love. I also love that it's a collaboration because you hear the female version and the male version of the experience almost. As you can see from the image above, the lyrics, "Oh my my, you just took me by surprise. And I can't believe my eyes; Oh I must be seeing blind." It's an upbeat-ish song and in my opinion is a feel good song as well. It's a song that as soon as I heard it, I knew I'd be adding it to my playlist! Click here to listen to Seeing Blind on Spotify.



2. Demi Lovato - Daddy Issues.



This song is EPIC! Again it has an upbeat vibe and at the minute, I have been LOVING that in music! I also love how sassy this song is and just how she's got a similar vibe of how boys are playing games with her. I added this song from the Tell Me You Love Me album, because it's got a nice dancey vibe and it just makes me feel happy and alive. Click here to listen to Daddy Issues on Spotify. 





3. Dua Lipa - New Rules.



I mean... Who isn't love this song right now? The song is legit relatable to anyone that has gone back to an ex/an old crush when they said they were done. And this song just reminds me of myself because when it comes to getting over someone, I always set myself rules. I am just LIVING for Dua Lipa at the minute but hey, isn't everyone? Click here to listen to New Rules on Spotify.





4. Rita Ora - Anywhere


Now if you didn't know this about me yet, then I am extremely disappointed: I. FUCKING. LOVE. RITA. ORA! Every single she has brought out this year has been a banger and I just cannot get over how much I love them!!! Anywhere is a song that reminds you of the weekend, having fun with your friends and not having a care in the world. I love it so much and I really, really need an album from her. Click here to listen to Anywhere on Spotify.




5. Camilla Cabello - Havana



Okay so I hear this song at least once every single day at work. It's one of those songs that you know the words to instantly and it's an addictive song. It's also one of those songs that I don't mind if I hear more than once the same day. I absolutely LOVE the music video. Oh my goodness I got major Jane The Virgin feels from the beginning and her acting skills are suprisingly amazing! Click here to listen to Havana on Spotify.



And these are my favourite five songs that I have been loving this week!

What songs have you been loving? Drop me a comment and I'll give 'em a listen!

See ya Wednesday!


Sunday, 29 October 2017

How I Keep Myself Organised When Writing My Book.

Hello Humans! At the minute I'm currently trying to get used to a new big change in my life, that my poor book has been left in the back burner. Nonetheless, whenever I am in "book-crazy mode", I like to make sure I am well organised, so every time I go back to writing, I know exactly what I want to achieve.

So I have put together a few tips and tricks of what I have done, that may also help you as well.

1. Get A Notebook.



I know what you're thinking. You're writing your book on your laptop, but you're suggesting getting a notebook? By writing down every detail that's important to your book/story, when you forget the most simplest detail, you can always go back and check. I also use my notebook in a scrapbook sense, so I can print out pictures, cut them down to size and stick them in. Then I explain what I'm taking from each picture and it helps me have something to relate to when I'm writing.




2. Find Your Playlist.

If you follow me on YouTube, you will have heard me mention time and time again about how music speaks to me. I have also mentioned how The Lumineers' album "Cleopatra" is the perfect writing album for me. I don't know if it's the melodies of the songs and how every song meshes well with the previous, but whenever I have my earphones in and I'm playing that album, I am motivated and I usually write for hours with the album looping from start to end over and over again.


3. Pencil In Days.

It sounds silly I know. But life can get so hectic and in the way of your passions, that you forget about doing it: writing. I have a Filofax - two to be exact, and I am constantly writing in it what I want/need to do on certain days. And yes, "write story" is in there lots of times. Because life is crazy and we don't always have time. But if like me, your book is your baby, you need to keep going at it.


4. Stay Motivated.

I understand that when the flow isn't happening, it's easy to give up. But DON'T! You're passionate about this story you've created so why lose the amazing things you've already written? Just remember why you started writing your book. Write the story you want to.



So here are my top 4 tips on how to keep organised and motivated when writing my book! I hope you enjoyed this post and I'll be back on Wednesday with a What I Ate Wednesday! 


Saturday, 14 October 2017

Please can you just care about me?

You’re breaking my heart,
And you don’t even realise you’re doing it.
Everything seems like a came with you.
You flirt with girl after girl in front of my face,
And I feel the tears leave my eyes.

I wrote you a letter.
A letter wishing that I could send you,
But it’s too much, too soon.
I see you texting her.
You have no problem texting her.
So why can’t you ever text me back?

We had a great night, this weekend.
But that’s because you you was lonely.
You’re using me.
Like I’m just a rag doll,
Or a toy, that you can throw back into the toy box whenever you’re done.


Why can’t you notice when I’m so close to breaking down?
Why can’t you ask me how I’m doing?
Why can’t you be how you were last year?
Why can’t you care about me?
Am I not good enough?

Friday, 13 October 2017

Pondering Over The Memory Of You.


You’re slipping into my subconscious again. And everything felt like it did before: with the way I woke up and longed for it to be real, but then realisation washed over me. I no longer care about your approval, so why are you back again in my dreams?

I’ve found that today whenever I’ve been busy or not, it’s all I’ve thought about. And I remember every detail so vividly, it’s like I’ve just woken up time and time again. I remember when I used to wish what you were doing every single day and hoping that you’d reply to my messages. But now I’m older and I’m wiser, and I understand that this was a one-sided thing. You didn’t feel the same way.


Thank you for slipping into my dream last night. It was nice to see you – to dream you, but now; I must say goodbye.

Tuesday, 10 October 2017

Memories

When they used to say your name, the smile used to be so wide that it was brightening. My heart would race and butterflies would attack my insides. It was new, raw and it was honest. And these days, your name gets mentioned and it’s a broken a smile with a heavy heart. Because we’re not what we used to be and you moved on, without a single hint of me in your mind. Our little routine we had was now one-sided and I felt lost. I feel myself getting angry at myself for still trying, because there’s still an inch of hope that you sometimes think of me. And if you do, I hope it makes you breathless at the thought of my name and the heaviness inside hits you; even if it’s just for a millisecond. Because then you get an insight on how I’ve felt over the last couple of years.

It's not my fault.

Scribbling your name in my diary,
With my heart on my sleeve;
Because I’m your stereotypical girl,
With a school-girl crush.

It’s not my fault that you bring out this side of me.
But I’m loving the way my heart skips a beat,
Whenever I see your face;
Or even hear your voice.

It’s not my fault that my stomach ties in knots,
Whenever you’re in the same room.
Or that my hands start to shake,
As you make your way over to me.

It’s not my fault that I’m a mess inside whenever you’re around.
You have an effect on me.
Something that I’ve never had before.
Oh, how I wish you felt the same way,
And that you get nervous in my presence.
But acting is your game,
And you know how to bluff your way through it.


It’s not my fault.
But darling,
It’s not yours either.

Love Letter

Darling I have liked you for the longest time.
There’s something in the way you smile.
But I’ve distracted myself with pretty boys,
As the doubts are loud in my mind.

But here we are again;
Face to face.
And I don’t know what to say,
To make you look my way.
Because I’m constantly worrying,
Of saying something wrong;
Or say something;
That’ll make you go.

Because I never realised how special you are,
And how strong these feelings mean;
Until I see your face,
And everything becomes so clear.


And I’m wishing on shooting stars,
Hoping that one day;
You’ll feel the same way.
Because darling;
I’ve liked you for the longest time.

Writing about you...

Comparing 12 months together,
And oh how everything is different.
I’m more confident; more daring.
Last year, I didn’t dare breathe in his direction.

More personal conversations,
Rather than just talking about work.
But I’m longing to see his face,
To hear his voice even more.

My heart still races whenever I see his name,
And a smile creeps up on my face.
I’m falling,
And this time – I know it.


Please don’t forget about me.
As I’m just a crack in the sidewalk,
And he’s a garden of roses.

Drabbles on paper.

I find myself dreaming about you with my eyes open.
Your name has slotted so far in my brain,
That you’re constantly on my mind.
I’m always wondering how you are,
And what you’re doing.
But I know it’s not the same the other way around.

I find myself wanting to beam with excitement,
And shower you with compliments about your work.
You’re getting the recognition you deserve,
And that makes my heart warm with pride.
I don’t think you realise just how great you are.

Closing my eyes and imagining your hand entwined with mine,
With your legs tangled with my own;
Are the kind of thoughts that I drift off to each night.
I can’t get your smile out of my mind,
Or your deep brown eyes.
You’ve got an effect on me,
And you have since day one.


Please tell me it’s not all for nothing.
That you don’t smile when you read the words I’ve said to you.
When you see that you’ve been on my mind long enough,
To create something for your eyes and anyone else’s who wants to see.
Tell me that you long to know my opinion,
When you’re letting me in on a secret.
Like how you like to let me know things first,
Before it’s exposed to the whole world.

Infatuated

I’m wondering what it’s like to hold your hand.
To talk about personal things,
And to make that smile grow on your face.

I find myself infatuated by you,
Wondering how you are,
And what you’re doing.


When I think about the last time I saw you,
There’s an emptiness inside,
And an aching pain in my chest.
Because you bring me back to life.


I’m infatuated to you,
And I’m merely just a crack in your windshield.

Daydream.

Chocolate brown eyes stare at me,
As I close my hazel eyes.
Their stare lingers,
As my fingertips brush over their features;
My eyes full of wonder.
As they smile,
The light in their pupils light up,
Causing my heart to ignite with warmth.
They run their fingers through my hair,
As my lids get heavy.
Murmuring sweet nothings in my ear,
I find myself snuggling closer.
Their arms wrapped around my body,
I smile at the comfort and protection.
And as the darkness enters my mind;
I’m then transported to a new day,
And an empty bed.

There's a boy I know

There’s a boy I know,
That is the big mystery in my life.
He has a bright smile,
That makes my heart race;
And makes my knees weak.

There’s a boy I know,
That updates me about his work.
He appreciates my support,
Whenever I give him my opinion.

There’s a boy I know,
That makes me want to follow my dreams;
Because he’s proved that dreams come true.

There’s a boy I know,
That compliments my work,
And shares it for the world to see.

There’s a boy I know,
That has a down-to-earth personality.
He’s always so polite to everyone,
Even when others aren’t so polite back.


There’s a boy I know,
That I wish I could tell everything to.
But my weeds in the cracks,
Are too much for his rose garden.

365 Days

365 days. And in those 365 days, I’ve watched the way you work a room. The way your lips tremble, and the way your whole face brightens up when you’re smiling.

I’ve noticed your talent shine through every time I see you. I’ve noticed the way my heart races whenever we’re in the same room. I’ve noticed so much, in even more than 365 days.

Ever since our first encounter, I’ve been enchanted to meet you again. I’ve been so desperate and so eager, that I would do anything to have the same moment over and over again. The desire is so strong; it’s almost like a drug.

I don’t think you quite realise just how infatuated I am with you. How much that even a simple reply can send me into a smiley daze.


You are the most wonderful person, dear. And in these 365 days, I’ve enjoyed every minute. What a year it’s been.

Letters #14

I’ll always be there,
Front row,
Cheering you on.

And afterwards I’ll express my thoughts,
And hopefully you’ll see my pride shining through.


Because I’ve known for the longest time:
Your talents and the way you shine.
And now everyone else is getting to see it.

Letters #13

Why am I crushing so hard on a lost cause?

You don’t like me
The way that I like you.


It’s hopeless – pathetic.
And yet.
I can’t stop thinking about you.

Letters #12

I’m filled with pride because of your work,
And I want to share my praises with you.

But I can’t;
Because I can’t seem to get a reply from you.

What happened?
Did I do something wrong?


I just don’t understand…

Letters #11

Whenever I try not to think about you,
There’s something that pops up.

Whether it be your work,
An update;
Or something much more different.


I find you fascinating and I want to pick apart your brain.
But I’m merely a crack in your pavement.
Nothing extraordinary.
Just boring.

Letters #10

I thought about your smile today,
And it sent fireworks straight to my heart.

Eyes crinkled,
Face lit up;
And a drum starting in my chest.


Oh, how I wish I could see that smile every day.

Letters #9

I’m addicted to knowing what you’re doing every day.
But I’m also scared to ask;
Because I don’t want to annoy you.


I wonder what you think about first thing on a morning,
And who you long to have by your side.
I wish it was me.
But sadly – I know it’s not.

Letters #8

Purple is the colour that reminded me of you.
The bright lights and the murmur of the crowds still play in my ears.


Now whenever I see the colour orange;
I think of you.
Bright and colourful –
Just like you.

Letters #7

I’m too sad,
And too distracted,
To write a love letter for you tonight.
My mind has been taken over,
By the disappointment I’ve faced.


But know that you were in my thoughts,
And my heart longed for you.

Letters #6

You constantly have my head spinning,
And I can’t help but feel dizzy.

You’re making my body shake so much,
I’m scared I might faint.

My heart’s racing so fast,
I wonder if you can hear it.


My smile is stuck on my face,
Do you know it’s for you?

Letters #5

I was asked about you today.
They asked if I’d heard anything from you;
What you were up to next.
And it got me thinking:
They think we’re closer than we actually are.

And it’s nice,
And it’s sweet.
But it’s painful because it’s not true.
But you tell me about your work,
And we talk every once in a while.


But is it selfish to want more?

Letters #4

I believe in having ambitions in life.
Is it so wrong that you’re one of them?
People call me pathetic,
And they call me stupid;
But you’re on my mind 24/7.
I admire you.
And I wish I could spend my time telling you how much.

Letters #3

Call me sentimental,
Call me stupid.
Say that I live in fantasy land,
And that it’s never going to happen.
That’s okay.
Because I still believe.
And that’s all that really matters.

Letters #2

I wake up and think about you.
I get to work and I think about you.
I go to sleep and I think about you.
It’s all so agonisingly exhausting;
Because I know it’s not the same for you.

An Untitled Poem


I lay flowers for you,
While smiling sadly up at the sky.
It was something I was supposed to do,
But instead I leave it all behind –
The feeling of dread,
As I lay in bed;
Remembering the last time,
That we met.


I lay flowers for you,
Say goodbye,
And watch them take you away.
But I’ll never forget the time we had together.
You’ll be in my heart forever.

Christmas Poem


And the angels singing.
See nothing but white,
As I peer out into the dark sky.

Christmas Day is coming ’round,
Christmas songs are my new favourite sound.
The big day is vast approaching,
Boys and girls are innocently hoping.


It’s everyone’s favourite time of the year,
Children’s excitement is all I hear.
Merry Christmas to one and all;
Please let the snow fall.

Dear You...

I can hear you saying my name,
In the back of my mind.
The sound of your voice,
Makes my heart race.

You’re making me want to write love songs,
And write letters for you.
You’re making me wish,
About all the pretty, little things.

Your smile makes me swoon.
And standing near you,
Makes my knees go weak.


Random thoughts.

Letters #1

Fingertips hovering over the button;
Doubt filling my mind.
Locking my phone,
And moving it out of my sight;
The decision is final.


I don’t want to look foolish,
I don’t want to look dumb.
But I just want to get your attention,
And it’s making me a little obsessed.

A Poem For You.

Because it’s late,
And we’re driving around in your car.
Your window’s down,
Even though it’s cold.

And you’re making small conversation with me.
And we’re talking away,
And I feel like I’m home.

And the way you care,
It’s no surprise,
That I’m falling for your eyes.

You bring out the childlike crush on me,
And I’m loving every single minute.
Because my heart beats faster,
When you look at me.

And every time I smell cigarette smoke,
It brings me back to that night.
Reminding me of my clumsy moments,
And how grateful I was,
That you didn’t laugh.


I really shouldn’t,
But I think I like you.
And that’s what scares me.
To get hurt,
From someone like you,
All over again.

Cologne

Can I please steal some of the cologne you wear?
Just a half-bottled, or an almost empty one.
I don’t need a full one.
Just enough to breathe it in, whenever I’m missing you.

Can you give me one of your t-shirts that you don’t wear anymore?
I want to wear it for bed,
And spray cologne over it;
So I can fall asleep, with you right beside me.

Can you tell me what your favourite song is?
Because I want to play it every single time that you get in the car,
Just for you to sing along, like you do,
And I can smile like an idiot,
And just listen to you.
And when you’re not there,
And I know we won’t be seeing each other for a while,
I can play it out loud,
And imagine your voice singing it out.
But most importantly,
Whenever I smell your cologne;
My heart races, and my senses are so much stronger.
You have such an effect on me.
So much more deeper than anyone else ever has.

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